With the holidays here (and soon to be over), it is wise to embrace the challenges of shopping, traveling, and preparing meals ‘with a positive attitude.’

Keep in mind, some stressful events can be fun!

Also, know that nothing in life is perfect and many things do not happen in ‘real life’ as anticipated. It is nice to dream and believe that good things come to those who work hard and it would be nice if all people treated others with kindness and respect at all times. Yet, the holiday season presents a time when people are busy and rushed. Consequently, joyful expressions and kind gestures are not always portrayed by people during this time of year.

Trying to spend ample time with several family members, baking, wrapping gifts, and taking care of children can add to the stress of any average day. Simply by giving ‘thanks’ you are choosing an inexpensive and unforgettable way to show gratitude toward others. For example, saying ‘thank you’ can make another person feel appreciated after completing a tedious task or simply performing a thoughtful act of kindness. Moreover, instead of being angry because your daughter forgot her hair bow for church, focus on being thankful that she is with you and agrees to go to church. Choose quality times that you and your family can spend together without concentrating on who got what gift and who spent the most money.

Families are expected to go through ‘ups and downs’ together. In a sense, that is what makes families bond—as long as they can remain cohesive and not allow bitter circumstances to create a distance between them.

The combination of stress from the holidays, work, travel and relationships can become overwhelming. Yet, research indicates that exercise and eating healthy can make a big difference in reducing levels of stress. Walking is a great activity for combating stressful tension and it doesn’t require a monthly fee, nor is it strenuous on the body’s muscles.

Other than relationships and physical demands, finances can serve as a major trigger point for creating stress during the holidays. Of course, relationships can create turmoil when misunderstandings occur. Conflicts can arise due to a difference in personalities, and sometimes people tend to hurt those whom they love the most. The strain of shopping, running ‘here and there’ for social events, and tending to chores can create a vicious cycle of fatigue and insomnia. When finances are affected by overspending, people often feel helpless and sad.

In order to prevent holiday stress and depression, it is wise to accept that things will not always go as planned. Therefore, families must remember to be realistic. For example, the location of family gatherings or yearly traditions may change. Family members must be able to set aside differences and allow themselves to understand and accept what others might be feeling. Practicing forgiveness is a good habit to learn at any age.  Acknowledging the feelings of others is sometimes difficult when you are not feeling your best. If for any reason you might be feeling depressed, angry, or lonely, take the time to seek help from others. Find a way to stay busy even if it means volunteering to help someone else.

Since money is a factor that can create tension for a family, keep in mind the importance of sticking to a budget. Pay your bills before you shop. Strive to plan ahead and say “no” to projects or activities that you may not have the time to embark on. Most importantly, take a breather when necessary.

Remember to rethink situations you are not clear about and remind yourself that all humans make mistakes. Then, enjoy yourself, your family, your friends, and the holidays.

Recognizing stress, and then finding measures to deal with it, is crucial. If you can’t find comfort in the speed bumps, try a massage.

Happy Holidays!

Dr. Sonya Rogers is a certified counselor who lives in Daphne. 

Her column appears regularly in the Daphne Bulletin and Spanish Fort Sun.